An institution - The Noddy Party at Vergelegen Somerset West

The Noddy Party (Noddy's Party) is a real institution in Somerset West. It is arranged by the Round Table 31 of Somerset West and takes place on the historic Vergelegen wine farm.

Such a lovely family event at an incredible venue.

We've been attending for years now! Our kids love it. And the picnic is great for the adults. Best of all it is a great cause for charity!  The proceeds from the party (which runs every night for a week or two) go to the Masikule Child care project that caters for disabled children from dissadvanted backgrounds.

Does your city or town have any annual events that have become a local institution?  I'd love to hear about them, and please post a link or two, so that I can check them out.

Thanks!

Dion

Don't cherish your pain...

This week Megan and I went for a session with a local play therapist. It too the form of an interview to prepare the therapist for some time that she will spend with our little girl Courtney.

After Courtney's diagnosis, surgery and treatment for her brain tumor we considered that it may be a good idea for her to have some help in processing what she has been through.

Cancer can be scary for a person of any age, can you imagine what a challenge it is for an 11 year old?

Also, we have picked up that Courts is asking one or two difficult questions and has been working through the events of the past three months.

It was a tough meeting - Megan was quite emotional. It broke my heart. We spoke about our own sense of helplessness as parents. How we had wished to be able to remove the pain, calm her fears, and take the hardship upon ourselves. We also spoke about the joy, and guilt, that we felt with her diagnosis. She is better! Yet, there are some who are not.

But, I do know that this is part of the process of dealing with the wound. It will be better. Nothing worthwhile comes without some struggle. We certainly experienced this, first hand, as we celebrated Liam's 4th birthday this week. Indeed, the first four years of his life have also had their fair share of difficulty.

Then, on Friday evening we visited with some friends. Etienne Piek, a close friend who currently heads up the Global Day of Prayer (he is leaving to work with 24/7 Prayer in London in a few weeks), was there. And so was my friend Cois, the head of Pneumatix (a media and arts training academy in Somerset West). The three of us were sharing some of our challenges around the fire. Etienne is having to be away from his family quite a bit. Cois has faced some challenges with the credit crunch. And I spoke about the session with the play therapist.

Etienne made a remark that has stuck with me. He said 'Be careful that you don't cherish your pain too much.'

These are wise words. I think if I understood his statement correctly he was warning all of us not to become too dependent upon the sympathy that comes from suffering, and the sense of 'righteous suffering' that we often feel when we face hardships. Indeed, I have experienced both in abundant measures. People have lovingly care, and I have felt sorry for myself and my family.

Of course the reality is that there does come a time when one must 'turn one's face into the storm' and sail forward. I feel that this December will be a time for me, and our family, to connect, have fun, and look beyond the challenges of 2010 towards 2011. I doubt that we shall ever be completely free from the hollow feeling that we felt as we went through the last few months, but I do know that we cannot allow that to stop us from enjoying the blessing of life in abundance! We need to be careful that we don't get stuck in the past, stuck in our struggle, and in so doing miss out on our glorious and blessed present!

I know that there are many others out there who have faced far greater struggle than we have, perhaps the death of a child, the suffering of a wife or husband, or the personal struggle with a terminal illness. How have you coped with the emotions, and fears, that go along with these events? I'd love to hear your input and feedback!

Happy 4th birthday to Liam the Great!

Today we gave thanks to God for the life of our precious big boy, Liam. You can read the posts about him here.  He is 4 years old today.  He was born very early (quite eager to get going in life, so he decided to come into the world 3 months early.  He was born premature at 27 weeks).  Our little Forster children are eager beavers, what can we say?!

When he was about a week old we took a picture of him with his little teddy bear.  He was the same size as the bear at that stage. Each year we have taken another picture of him with the teddy bear to show how he is growing.  Just look at this year's picture - Liam is such a big boy with big strong muscles!!!

Liam, one day you may read this - if you do mom and I want you to know how precious you are to us.  You are perfect in every way.  Your life is a gift from God to the world.  Use it wisely!  You can do so much to make the world a better place.  We cannot stop thanking God for you and Courtney.  You're both so special and unique.  We love you!

Have a blessed day my boy!  Tonight we can ride our bikes in the front garden!

Thank goodness for YouTube and Long Division!

Yup, this evening the inevitable happened... I turned to google to find a video that explains how to do Grade 5 long division.  Sure, I did Mathematics as part of my first studies at in a Bachelor of Science degree at WITS many, many, many years ago... And, yes, I devoted quite a substantial portion of one of the chapters of my doctoral research (in fact a critical part in the argument of my PhD) to a complex set of mathematical equations that have to do with Strong Artificial Intelligence and Cognitive Neuroscience... Yes, yes, yes... 

BUT, these are different times!  The dendrites in my little old brain are calcifying and Mathematics is more difficult in the 5th grade than it was in my PhD... Ha ha, either that, or I have complete forgotten how to do Mathematics without a calculator!

The task was simple - write 1/8 as a fraction...  Mmmmmm... It took me a while to remember how to do that.  Of course the answer (which took me a while to work out) is this:

1/8 = 1/8 * 125/125 = 125/1000 = 0.125

I know some of you are laughing... But, when you pick yourselves up off the floor you might want to watch this little 'refresher' video long division (without a calculator) to help your kids get their homework done!

Seriously though, it is SUCH a blessing to help Courtney to catch up with her Maths after the 8 weeks she had off from the time of hear hospitalization, through her surgery, up to her recovery and return to school!

I do, however, praise and thank God for YouTube!

Overcome with gratitude and grace - Courtney returns to school!

This morning Megan, Courtney, Liam and I gathered for a little prayer of thanksgiving and praise.  

Today Courtney went back to school - and she is well!  She has recovered from her surgery, the cancer is gone, and she is a happy, healthy little 11 year old girl!  We are so thankful!  

Our whole lives have been changed by this series of events.  We have a renewed appreciation of God's gracious love and care, and such confidence in the love and grace of our friends, many family, and our local Church.  Truly, we are overcome with gratitude and grace today!

It was two months ago today that our journey began (you can read the whole story as it unfolded in a series of posts here.  It starts with the most recent post, so you will need go back to the first post to pick up at the start of the story) - Megan went into hospital for a surgical procedure, and on the same day Liam fell ill. It was a very stressful time for us as a family.  Little did we know what would happen in the weeks to follow.  

That weekend I was speaking at a conference in Johannesburg when Megan phoned me to say that Courtney's eye had swollen closed as a result of a bad cold and sinus infection.  Courtney was hospitalized for the first time on Sunday the 5th of September.  The next morning when they did a CAT scan to see where the swelling was, and in there was any damage to the eye, they discovered every person's worst nightmare - cancer.

The doctor called us aside and told us that they had found a 3cm growth (unrelated to the eye infection), located in the 4th cerebral ventricle.  We were devastated!  But the love of family and friends, the support of our Church, and the care of our doctors gave us great hope and encouragement.  Our little girl spent a few days in hospital recovering from the infection and we waited for her brain surgery which eventually took place on the 23rd of September.  She spent more than 3 hours in surgery.  The doctor was very pleased with the procedure, but the following day he told us that what he had seen was not good news.  He felt confident that Courtney's cancer was malignant and that she would need some further treatment from a pediatric oncologist.  We braced ourselves for that.  However, the next day he called me (while I was still in the ICU with Courtney) overjoyed to tell me that the histology had shown that Courtney had an extremely rare form of brain cancer which is completely benign!  The surgery was a cure - she was free of cancer!

I cannot tell you the sense of relief and gratitude that we experienced on that day, and many times after that in the days that followed!

Well, after a few days in ICU, a couple more in the general ward, Courtney came home to recover.  She had a massive surgical procedure that cut into her brain - we knew that her recovery would be slow.  At first she simply slept (sometimes up to 22 hours a day), and when she was awake she was constantly vomiting.  Her mood was very low.  However, we prayed for her every day, encouraged her and did our best to be patient, supportive and loving.  With each day that passed the pain grew less, the nausea settled and her lovely little personality returned!

This morning as we prayed together she was just like the little girl who turned 11 in August - full of fun, excited about the opportunities of the day, a wonderful daughter who loves the Lord and has a zest for life.  She had a hair cut last week (just to be sure that the bit where her head was shaved was well covered for her return to school).  Megan had prepared to take her to school and help her to get her bag to class and get her settled.  But, when she arrived at the gate a number of Courtney's friends were waiting there to help her and welcome her in!

That makes my heart so glad!

So, first, let me say how grateful we are to all of you that prayed for us and have helped us through these trying times.  We are thankful that God's love has brought us through stronger and with more faith! Second, please continue to pray for our family - we certainly need it!  Please also remember Courtney in your prayers from time to time.  She has some catching up to do for school work that she has missed.  But more than that our heart's desire is that she will know just how precious she is to God and to us, and that her life is an immeasurable gift!

The journey is drawing to a close! An update on Courtney 1 October 2010

We cannot thank and praise God sufficiently for His unending mercy and grace to Courtney and our whole family!  

We love our girl so very, very much!  Her life is an immeasurable gift to us, and we know that God has such a special plan for our princess.  He has carried her through this last tough month, offering her courage and wisdom well beyond her tender age. We are so proud of Courtney - she has faced her fears, endured pain and uncertainty with courage, and through it all been a shining example of a young Christian woman whose faith is in our God!

Today, on the 1st of October, Courtney's journey with cancer has come to an end!!

This morning we took her back to Dr Wessels at the Somerset West Mediclinic for a final checkup and to have the 24 staples removed from her neck and head.  While she will bear the physical scar from this month on her body for some years, we are praying that God will completely remove any emotional scars there may be!  We know that she will soon return to her vibrant love of life!  The signs are already there!

Courtney is such a brave little girl. Her courage has blessed and inspired me. 

Sure, she cried a little today as they removed the staples, but in the end she managed a great smile!  We're hoping that she will return to school next week (for part of the day to start with, and then ease her way back in).

She received some medication to deal with the last of the blood and tissue that is in her brain and spinal fluid (this is a bit like a mild meningitis).  But this will clear and soon there will be no more headaches, vomiting or nausea.

All glory to God who not only creates in magnificence, but also re-creates, sustains and perfects His creation!

You can read about Courtney's journey through this illness to the miracle of healing by clicking here (or on the tag 'miraclegirl').

You may recall that our journey began about a month ago when Courtney fell ill with a cold.  This quickly spread into a sinus infection and later she was hospitalised with a swollen face and eye. Because there was some concern about the damage to her optical nerve (and to see where the infection was) she went for an MRI.  At that point it was discovered that she had a 3cm tumor in the 4th cerebral ventricle.  She was treated for the infection to her eye and her surgery was scheduled for two weeks later.  The operation was a great success and the neurosurgeon was overjoyed that he had completely removed the tumour. There was no damage to her brain at all.  

Whilst the worst was feared about the histology of the tumor, the best results returned a few days later!  Courtney's tumor was benign - she had a very rare form of brain cancer called a Choroid Plexus Papilloma (accounting for between 0.4-0.6% of tumors in that area of the brain). Even the doctor assured us that this was an answer to prayer since the Medulloblastoma (which is a much more agressive cancer) is the more likely growth in that region.  God in His grace had healed her!

All in all we have experienced anew the wonder of God's loving grace and power, it has been emphasized through the wonderful care and love of the body of Christ.  As family, friends and colleagues - and even people we don't know - have prayed for Courtney, sent notes, cooked meals, sent messages and loved us on behalf of Christ!

I want to encourage you about the certainty of God's love in every situation (as Romans 8.28 says).  Moreover, God's mercy and compassion is a source of great power and strength in such trying times (please read Lamentations 3.21-26 and Psalm 33.18-22).  

If you come upon this post in the years after October 2010; and you find yourself struggling with the diagnosis of a loved one, perhaps a child or a spouse, then please be encouraged by what God has done in Courtney's life.  Feel free to drop us a line.  It would be our joy to pray with you and offer you encouragement and care.

This unfortunate event has renewed our faith in God's power.  It has also caused us to have to reconsider our priorities in life!  Our children truly are our most precious gifts from the Lord - nothing is more valuable.  Work, ambition, material advancement, personal fulfilment, all of these things must rightly take their place behind the priority of creating a loving home to safely nurture our children towards their great destiny.

As you know both Liam and Courtney have had their fair share of health challenges in life - we thank God for all He has done in them and for what God wants to do with Courtney and with Liam.

Courtney's whole life lies ahead of her - please pray for our princess and ask God to bless and protect her in the many years that lie ahead!  Please pray the same thing for little Liam! May he too come to grow into all that God has destined him to be!

With inexpressible gratitude for God's loving grace,

Dion, Megan, Courtney and Liam.

Update on Courtney 23 September 2010 - after surgery

We are so thankful!  Courtney's surgery went very well!  We saw the neurosurgeon a little while ago - he was confident that he had removed the tumor effectively!  The surgery took 3 hours to perform.

We have just been with Courts in the ICU where she will stay for a day or two.  She woke up and was able to move all her limbs etc.  She is quite nauseous (both from the anaesthesia and from the trauma to the cerebellum).  But, they have her well medicated.  They will keep her a little sedated to reduce the swelling to the brain.  She is also in a bit of pain, but I think that is quite understandable and normal.  We are so blessed that we know a number of the doctors who are treating her personally (some belong to our Church, others are friends with whom I cycle on Lourensford).  This has been quite comforting because they are able to 'interpret' the news of the surgery for us and offer us some good practical and reassuring advice.

We will only get the results from histology of the tumor in a few days.  As soon as we have news on that we will let you know.  But, we are trusting for a perfect bill of health.

They had to shave a fair amount of the back of her head to do the surgery - she's not going to be too happy about that when she wakes up!  But, that is the least of our worries!

Thanks once again to everyone who has called, sent text messages, facebook messages, tweets and helped with food etc.  We are truly grateful.  It is likely that either Megie or I will spend the night at the hospital again.  Courts will be in ICU for the next 2 days and then into the general ward.

Unfortunately our phones have to be kept off while were in the ICU so we may not see, or respond, to messages as quickly as we would like.

For regular updates please either follow my twitter feed (see the twitter feed on the right hand side of this page, or go to @digitaldion on twitter.com.

God bless,

Dion, Megan, Courtney and Liam

Update on Courtney 23 September 2010 morning

Hi friends,

Just to give you a quick update on Courts.

We had a good restful evening at the hospital last night. We talked, prayed, played games (just about everything BUT sleep). It was good father / daughter time)!

She went into theatre at 7.30 this morning. She was very brave. Megie and I, not so much.

The doctor says the operation will take about 3 hours. I'm not sure when we will get the results from the biopsy of the tumor. I'll let you know once we hear anything.

She will go into ICU for a day or two.

Unfortunately they have to shave quite a lot of her head. I've promised her that if they shave her head I will do the same - so you may see me with a 'poena' next week ;-)

Well friends, thanks so much for the prayers and care. We'll keep you updated on any news we receive.

God is indeed good! His mercy is new every morning, it never comes to an end (Lam 3.21-26).

God bless,

Dion, Megie, Courtney and Liam

Courtney's surgery is confirmed for 7.30 on the 23rd of September

Courtney's surgery is confirmed for 7.30AM tomorrow morning (23 September 2010).

Please could we ask for your prayers for her, the surgeon (Dr. Wessels), and all of the nursing and support staff at the hospital. 

Please also pray for Megan, little Liam and I. We relying on God's goodness and grace. 

I will spend the night with her at the hospital - we're going to relax, pray, watch a few movies, and enjoy our time together!

Please forgive us if we don't respond to emails, SMS's, phone calls or emails - we have received so many calls and messages that it is not possible to respond to all of them.  So sorry!  We'll check in here and on facebook as time allows.

My friend @Cois sent me the following verse from the Message (Matthew 6:34) - it is very encouraging indeed:

“Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don’t get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes. A Simple Guide for Behavior”

An update on Courtney 21 September 2010

This morning Courtney went for a CT scan to see if the infection in her sinuses had completely cleared. She is almost there! Not quite 100%, but the doctors 'conferred' and decided that they would go ahead with the surgery to remove the tumor on the Thursday morning the 23rd of September (thanks for spotting the mistake Ruby!). In the meantime Courtney will start a another course of antibiotics today.

Liam (the Great!) has been in great health. We cannot tell you how thankful we are for God's gracious care for our family! We have truly experienced the most indescribable blessing and peace in the last few weeks.

Our friends and family, the Church, work colleagues and so many others who we don't even know have blessed us with encouragement and love. Yesterday Courtney received a package with 20 letters from one of the Lausanne Congress staff who arrived in advance of the meetings. A group of Christians in America had heard about Courtney and were moved to each write her a little card with encouragement. Such a blessing! Our 'local' friends have made meals, sent messages, left voicemail messages and truly taken great care of us.

Last night Courtney sang a solo and played her guitar in her school concert. She has such talent! It was a blessing to be able to take her to participate in that event - we could see that it has lifted her spirits! She has been a little down over the last few days.

BUT, today her uncle Craig (Megan's brother from the UK) and her Granny (Megan's mom who lives in Natal) arrived to visit her! Courtney is over the moon to see them! It has truly made her day. We are so thankful for times such as these.

As for Megan and I, we are both doing well, although a little tired. We wake up in the morning feeling as tired as when we went to bed! I'm sure that the worry of the surgery and the outcome of the test results of the tumor contribute to our sense of tiredness!

However, we have experienced such a sense of God's immeasurable grace and blessing during this time! We are so certain of God's ability to do more than we could ever imagine or hope for (Eph 3.20). Thank you for standing with us in faith!

God is truly good!

What will matter - Michael Josephson

This morning I attended the Unashamedly Ethical Cape Town Community breakfast.  I would highly recommend that you consider joining the Unashamedly Ethical campaign! Once you have joined you can join your local community (I happen to belong to the Cape Town community), and you will be updated on events, breakfasts, training courses, and other benefits.

The speaker this morning was Professor John Volmink (the inspector General of Education for South Africa).  John is a good friend - we serve on a number of boards together.

He has an incredible testimony and life story.  He is the father of 10 children (5 are his own and 4 are adopted children).  He holds a Ph.D in Mathematics from Cornell University in the US (where he was also a Professor for some years).  He was previously the Vice Chancellor of the University of KwaZulu Natal (Durban).

The topic of John's talk was on the third commitment of the Unashamedly Ethical campaign - To do nothing out of selfish ambition or conceit, but to look out for the interests of others.

It was so inspiring to hear him speak of the many choices he has made in his life - some were easy, and some were not.  Yet, in faith, and with a great commitment to social transformation, he has attempted to serve his family, his community and our nation.  At times this has cost him dearly, but his intention is to be a person of significance rather than a mere success.

Here are a few quotes from his talk that I put on my twitter feed.  They were a great encouragement to me.

It is important to do well in life, but it is far more important to do good

On the topic of discipline, and the courage to make courageous choices he said:

Christian love is not just an emotion of the heart, it is a victory of the will

I was also challenged by this quote about doing the best in the context you find yourself, with the unique gifts and abilities that God has given to you (PS.  I wrote a chapter on this in our book 'Transform your work life: Turn your ordinary day into an extraordinary calling' - please see chapter 1 'The Big Question' for some practical tools and ideas to help you discover your unique design and purpose):

Rather be a 1st class version of yourself than a 2nd rate copy of someone else.

The audio from his talk will be uploaded onto the Unashamedly Ethical website within a few days.  So please look under the 'Local Community Event recordings' section of the web site.  Please also follow UE on Twitter and join them on facebook.

The poem below, from Michael Josephson, was a particular challenge to me - especially in our current situation with my daughter Courtney's health.  It is amazing how such an event helps one to rediscover what matters most.

Ready or not, some day it will all come to an end.

There will be no more sunrises, no minutes, hours or days. All the things you collected, whether treasured or forgotten will pass to someone else.

Your wealth, fame and temporal power will shrivel to irrelevance. It will not matter what you owned or what you were owed.

Your grudges, resentments, frustrations and jealousies will finally disappear.

So too, your hopes, ambitions, plans and to-do lists will expire. The wins and losses that once seemed so important will fade away.

It won't matter where you came from or what side of the tracks you lived on at the end. It won't matter whether you were beautiful or brilliant. Even your gender and skin color will be irrelevant.

So what will matter? How will the value of your days be measured?

What will matter is not what you bought but what you built, not what you got but what you gave.

What will matter is not your success but your significance.

What will matter is not what you learned but what you taught.

What will matter is every act of integrity, compassion, courage, or sacrifice that enriched, empowered or encouraged others to emulate your example.

What will matter is not your competence but your character.

What will matter is not how many people you knew, but how many will feel a lasting loss when your gone.

What will matter is not your memories but the memories that live in those who loved you.

What will matter is how long you will be remembered, by whom and for what.

Living a life that matters doesn't happen by accident.

It's not a matter of circumstance but of choice. Choose to live a life that matters.

Making memories

This weekend was a gift to our family! Since all travels have been halted until after Courtney's surgery we enjoyed a rare weekend at home without any commitments!

We slept in, went to the beach, rode our bikes in the back yard, went to Church and also drove through to beautiful Hermanus to see the whales.

Megie and I needed the 'space' and time to catch up with one another and chart the course ahead. We are both feeling bruised and a little weary. And of course our hearts are very tender for our little girl and what lies ahead for her (see this and this for details). However, we are encouraged and strengthened by God's unfailing love and mercy! We have experienced His love, mercy and grace through to kindness of so many friends and family.

Both Courts and Liam are getting healthy again. Liam may return to school after his bout of tonsillitis, pneumonia and ear infection (which all seem to be clearing). Courts won't return to school until after her surgery. However, she will participate in the school concert this week and also in the guitar concert on the 20th.

Thank you for all the love and support we've received!

This weekend was a chance to make memories. These are a few pictures from the weekend.