Days like these... They're part of 'real' life...

Today has been a 'real' day... What does that mean? Well, when I was a young (er) man I put my hands (and mind) to many things. Among those things was a brief stint of experimentation with acid (LSD to some). I was wild, my friends were wild, and my parents were scared stiff and worried most of the time. You can imagine!

My friends and I would go camping and take 'cuts' of the little squares of blotting paper and then just walk around experiencing the altered reality created by the chemicals in our brains. Colours, sounds, smells, and sensations. They were vivid and engaging...

At the end of our acid trip we talked about our experiences and commonly spoke of them as being 'real' (of course they were the LEAST real experiences we were having, it would have been better to say that these times and experiences we UN-real). Reality is much more engaging...

Since finding Christ, and the love that Christ has for me and all of creation, I have come to discover a whole new reality. Life in Christ is REAL for me. It is the most vivid reality, since Christ helps me to face struggle, and not just to avoid it, or blot it out.

This morning I awoke still feeling tired. We had left the hospital last night in tears! After Liam's lung collapsing, the physio, and just his generally poor condition we were exhausted. I got into bed knowing that I would wake up this morning and go into a meeting in which we would have to make some very tough choices about the lives of people just like me - they are people who have given their lives in service of Christ, they have children, a spouse, and the pressures of ministry. Yet, some of them do 'not have competent abillity to do our work' [that's a phrase that comes from the question asked of Methodist clergy at SYNOD each year, "Has Dion got competent abillity to do our work?" Because of this lack of ability, some of them would be facing the prospect of being released from ministry...

Decisions such as these always break me, they are real decisions, about real people, with real consequinces. There is a significant tension here. One feels empathy for the persons involved, but one also has to protect the integrity of the Church, and the members of Churches. For example if someone has to be released on moral grounds (e.g., the person who has stolen Church money, or has had an affair), one must do so to protect the Church and its members, but that means that a minister will face discipline and loose their ministry and income.

It is never an easy meeting... You can imagine! That's why the meeting has many wiser, and more experienced, members than I.

So, when I woke up I prayed that God would give me grace and wisdom, as well as a measure of courage to do what is right (both for Christ, the Church, and the individuals concerned). This is the reality of responsible Christian living...

In this age of hedonism, where pleasure is king, and the avoidance of pain and struggle is a preoccupation, very few people want to live REAL lives with real choices. But, God expects real living. Just read Micah 6:8... Listen to this:

He has showed you, O man, what is good.
And what does the LORD require of you?
To act justly and to love mercy
and to walk humbly with your God.

I think that there are many of us who like to walk humbly with God, but how many of us LOVE mercy (in an age of revenge?), and how many of us ACT justly (in a world of injustice - I mean just think about this simple little fact... I have 16 taps in my house! Between two bathrooms and the kitchen I have more taps in my house than some communities have in their whole area! I need to learn to love mercy and act justly in order to walk humbly with my God!)

So, the meeting went off as well as can be expected... Each decision was taken with great care, deliberation, and of course prayer. Some decisions will not be well received. But that is 'real' life, it is not UN-real life.

I don't want to go through life like those drug dulled weekends! I want to be truly alive! alive to God, alive to the reality of my own life, and the lives of others. I want to have the courage to do what is right, even if it is not popular.

I guess real living takes real faith. I pray for more of it in my life...