Quenching our thirst, buying food with money we don't have. Wine, and Milk and Honey! A year of God's gracious favour...

Tomorrow I shall be preaching in the company of some of the most affluent citizens of Africa, perhaps even the world... They are fortunate people in an unfortunate world. However, they work hard to earn their fortunes! Most nights they are still working long after I am home with my family. They face pressures and demands, responsibility, and live with a constant sense of expecatation. Many of them also live with the real guilt that comes from having 'made it'; from 'having it all', when there are so many who do not have enough...

I also live with that guilt - although for a slightly different reason. Strangely, though, guilt may be the wrong word. Perhaps I just confused. You see, I too have far more than I need, and have received absolutely lavish and undeserved favour this year! My bank account may not look like theirs, but my life is the same. I am rich in more ways than I can number, but what is different about my wealth is that unlike their deserved fortunes, I have not earned mine. They were given as a gift.

I follow many blogs. I have often mentioned that there are many blogs better than mine (in particular I love Sivin and Stephen's blogs).

But, this year I have often pondered this post by a fellow blogger, and friend, Pete. Strangely, I have thought about this post more than any other. It is an honest post, and it is true. It speaks of the fact that God does not have favourites. I like the theology of his post... In fact, it is also my theology (in the sense that I share Pete's perspective). However, I remember when I read it (February this year), little Liam had just come out of almost 3 months in the Pretoria East Hospital's ICU. He was small, weak, and should have been dead (because of his brain injuries) - yet somehow this God who shows no favour had heard my prayers, and the prayers of many others, and he lived. Perhaps it was the truth of the post, coupled with the grace of Liam's life, that caused this one post to remain in my mind. It dawned upon me throughout the year, again and again....

I was spending money that I didn't have! [Don't worry the image will become clearer in a little while]

This is also the year in which I celebrated my 13th wedding Anniversary. Megan has been a faithful and patient companion - she is loving beyond measure, and I am constantly humbled that someone so pure, gentle, gifted, and committed to Christ, would stick around with me. I am eccentric, I am difficulty, my life is irregular (when I am home I seldom sleep, I always work, I never stop dreaming about new ways to do ministry, about gadgets... And that's when I am home! I am so often away from home that I am always blessed when I return to find her lovingly accepting me back! I go to places she would love to go (like Oxford, Cambridge, Chicago, Sydney, Kuala Lumpur, Durham (US), Spain, Israel, Turkey, Morocco....), and places that neither of us would like to go (I won't mention those, because I have to return to some of them again next year). Yet, somehow even when she cannot be there with me she rejoices at my achievements and celebrates my success). If the truth be told Megan is much more gifted, and should have far more recognition than I do. I don't know why she loves me? But, I am glad that she does!

And so, I am fed by food that I cannot buy, and it sustains my living! [Yes, I'll explain in a moment!]

This is the year where my daughter, Courtney, learned to ride her bicycle, asked us to buy her high-heel shoes, stopped thinking that it was 'cool' for me to take her to school on the motorbike... Yet, even though she is growing up, she still likes to sit on my lap and watch TV. She still tells me about her friends, her joys, her struggles, and her wishes - and she does so enthusiastically! She still likes to fall asleep on our bed. She has also prayed for me, and often prays with me. This year, for the first time, she offered Megan and I the kind of comfort we have only ever experienced from other adults. When Liam was very ill and in hospital a few weeks ago, as Megie and I cried, she hugged us, told us he would be fine, and then said a little prayer. She is amazing! I cannot fathom why God would entrust me with someone so precious!

And so, my life is filled with the sweetness of honey! [Yup, stick around... I'll tell you why in a few moments]

This year was also another gracious year in the ministry of the Methodist Church of Southern Africa. Many of my friends would know that I resigned from the MCSA in April 2006 - the political wrangling in our denomination had become too much! Like any institution that involves people, this Church can be a difficult place. I couldn't take certain struggles anymore, and so for the sake of my love for Christ, and my love for the Church, I resigned. But, sanity prevailed, the Church's were gracious and courageous to see where change was needed, and I was persuaded to stay - thankfully! It has been a year of wonderful growth and maturing. Not very many things have changed. There are still difficult leaders, unrealistic expectations, little thanks, arduous demands, and troublesome cases... But, my perspective has been changed by grace. I do not serve in the Church for the church, I serve in the Church for the God who endured hardship, suffering, and even death, to achieve what was needed for my salvation. So, this year has been another gracious year of service! I am more fortunate than just about every other minister in our denomination! There have been a few tempting options this year, but I praise God for giving me the courage to stay where I am. It is right.

And so, God has given me milk - milk that deals with the heartburn of an imperfect meal... But, it works! And I am still able to eat!

I have experienced the grace of many friends this year! When I first prepared this post I wrote a whole list of names, and what they mean to me, and all they have meant to me this year... There are so many! However, I am afraid of not mentioning someone... So, just do a search for the word 'friend' on my blog and you will see who these people are. They shape me, encourage me, they challenge me, they forgive me, they help me, they put up with me, they pray with me, and they let me work out who I am. My life is full friends! They are a gift from God.

And so, I eat what is good, and my soul delights in such fare!

This has been a year of birth, and rebirth, for me. Sometimes I have rejoiced, and at other times I have grieved.

I am a parent, I am a husband, I am a servant, I am a leader, I am a preacher, I am a member of a local Church, I am a Christ-follower..

This year I have come to know, in new ways, what it means to live under God's grace! I live in a constant state of undeserved favour. Even though I am a theologian, I simply do not understand why I should be so richly blessed... That is a mystery - perhaps part of God's mystery?

So, tomorrow as I speak about a God who was born to die, as I speak to wealthy and fortunate people, I shall be speaking to myself... I shall speak about this grace, the God of grace, who graciously pours our that grace upon us... The God who came at Christmas time to call us to grace.

"Come all you who are thirsty, come to the waters; and you who have no money, come, buy and eat! Come buy wine and milk without money and without cost. Why spend money what is not bread, and your labour on what does not satisfy? Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good, and your soul will delight in the richest of fare. Give ear and come to me; hear me, that your soul may live. I will make an everlasting covenant with you, my faithful love promised to David. See I have made him a witness to the peoples, a leader and commander of peoples. Surely you will summon nations you know not, and nations that do not know will hasten to you, because of the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, for he has endowed you with spleandour" [Isaiah 55:1-5]

A blessed Christmas to you all. Thank you for being part of God's gift to Megan, Courtney, Liam and I this year. We give thanks to God for you!

Undeserving, but grateful to be alive in Christ,

Dion (Knysna, 24 December 2007)